anonymous letters

alongside my previous post
called 'therapeutical writing' i
decided to post one of the
anonymous letters that i've written.
you see, anonymous letters are a form of
my therapeutical writing and coping.

the meaning of these anonymous letters
are to free me from things that maybe someone
has said or done to me.
it's not always the answer to confront the
issue head-on. so, i cope with the issue
in this way, this form. my little scraps of paper.

here's an anonymous letter i wrote a
few weeks ago, i've found it in my pile of stuff,
it's my raw writing:

"it's really very upsetting when someone who
knows you... who has known you... all their lives puts
so little faith in who you truly are.

i know you don't like him and even though
it's been so long and i can't even remember why anymore
and it still to this day hurts me
somewhere deep, deep, inside...

i still want you to be a part of everything.
i want you to care. i might not show my feelings
as obviously as you do about certain things,
but that is just how we are.

i can't bear it sometimes because you think
i do things despite you. you should know me better
than that. honestly. it's never the intention,
even though i have really bad timing and
it appears like i am. you have no idea how much i try to
make you as well as everyone else happy.
even over my own happiness.

maybe you should be the one to understand for
once and try and let down your guard.
the fight is almost gone in me to help you, help me."